Tag Archives: horror movies

Scary Easter?

So I’m all about horror and making things fun and scary, but I’m really struggling with a creepy way to celebrate Easter, the most pastel of all holidays.  There just aren’t a lot of options here.  I mean, the holiday mascot is a fluffy bunny.

But I’m going to try my hardest.

First of all, the Easter horror movie selection is (not surprisingly) lacking.  There are only a handful, so I would recommend watching Easter Sunday (2014) and Peter Rottentail (2004).  I haven’t seen either, but Easter Sunday has some pretty good reviews, and Peter Rottentail just looks weird and funny in a very B-movie way.  Just Google it to look at the villain.  Michael Myers he (she?) is not, but it’s still promising.

Also a good idea would be to check out Critters 2.  It takes place near/on Easter, and there’s an excellent scene of the Easter Bunny getting attacked and killed.  Not the real one, just a guy in a suit.  Check it out:

Pretty cool, right?

Second, maybe find a way to maximize the creep factor of the day by being creative.  Start by making some spiderweb dyed eggs.  Just check out the many tutorials online.  You could even draw some skulls on non-dyed eggs with a sharpie.  That’s pretty simple.  And if you have kids that are on board the horror train (Side note: I feel like if that’s not a thing, it should totally be), give them some scary movies and gross toys in their Easter basket, which could totally be jet black, by the way.

Pastel is not a requirement.

So there you have it.  I tried and – just maybe? – succeeded.  I hope you all have a very creepy Easter.  Let me know if you have any other scary ways to celebrate.

Coming Soon 2017

For all the horror movie fans out there like myself, 2017 is going to be a fun year.  We’ve got a lot of new ideas to enjoy and some old favorites to revisit.  Here’s the list:

Movie TitleIMDb LinkRelease Date
Underworld: Blood WarsIMDbJanuary 6
The Bye Bye ManIMDbJanuary 13
SplitIMDbJanuary 20
Resident Evil: The Final ChapterIMDbJanuary 27
RingsIMDbFebruary 3
Patient ZeroIMDbFebruary 17
Get OutIMDbFebruary 24
RawIMDbMarch 10
The Belko ExperimentIMDbMarch 17
LifeIMDbMarch 24
PrevengeIMDbMarch 24
The VoidIMDbApril 7
Phoenix ForgottenIMDbApril 21
Alien: CovenantIMDbMay 19
It Comes at NightIMDbJune 9
The MummyIMDbJune 9
47 Meters DownIMDbJune 23
Amityville: The AwakeningIMDbJune 30
Wish UponIMDbJune 30
The Dark TowerIMDbJuly 28
Annabelle 2IMDbAugust 11
PolaroidIMDbAugust 25
TempleIMDbSeptember 1
JackalsIMDbSeptember 1
ItIMDbSeptember 8
Mother!IMDbSeptember 15
Friend RequestIMDbSeptember 22
Flatliners IMDbSeptember 29
Happy Death DayIMDbOctober 13
The BabysitterIMDbOctober 13
The SnowmanIMDbOctober 20
Tyler Perry's Boo 2! A Madea HalloweenIMDbOctober 20
Saw: LegacyIMDbOctober 27
PolaroidIMDbDecember 1
He's Out ThereIMDbDecember 1
Keep WatchingIMDbTBD 2017
Insidious: The Last KeyIMDbJanuary 5, 2018

Sequels, remakes, and reboots are everywhere you look, but I’m not complaining.  Jason Voorhees gets to drop in for a visit in October along with Jigsaw, and the new It movie really has my interest.  What movies are you looking forward to most in 2017?

UPDATE MARCH 18, 2017:  The list has been updated after consulting IMDb to see what I’ve missed.  You might notice that the newest Friday the 13th movie has been removed.  I’m sorry to say that it’s been cancelled due to the poor performance of Rings.  I know, I know.  I’m sad, too, but we still have many  horror movies to keep us busy this year.

Happy New Year!

Well, I hope everyone has had a great couple of months.  I took a bit of a longer break than planned, but it’s time to get back to bidness.

I’ll be posting at least once a week, more if I am able to fit it in.  Make sure you follow my blog and facebook page for updates, and check back here soon for a list of upcoming horror movies for the year.  There’s going to be a lot of them, so you better count for an increase in your entertainment budget for the year.  See you soon!

 

Home Invasion Horror Movies

Don’t Breathe hit theaters over the weekend, and it seems to have struck a chord with moviegoers.  It has impressed critics and topped the box office, so it got me thinking; what else can I and other horror movie fans do to satisfy our home invasion horror movie craving?

Never fear, because there are quite a few horror movies out there involving home invasions.  Here are my faves:

The Collector (2009)

This movie is pretty gruesome.  A man doing helping with maintenance at a family’s home is revealed in the beginning to actually be (SPOILER ALERT) casing the residence to break in while the family is away on vacation.   He follows through with his plan, but after he’s inside, he finds himself in a house rigged with Saw-like booby traps and the family being tortured.  It’s pretty crazy, but if you can’t take so-called  “torture porn,” you might want to watch this one with your finger on the fast forward button.

The Strangers (2008)

This movie gets a lot of flack for the poor decisions made by the lead characters played by Liv Tyler and Scott Speedman, but I still love this movie.  An on-the-rocks couple is spending some time at an isolated house, and terror comes knocking on their door in the form of a skinny, young lady looking for “Tamara.”  She ain’t, and soon the lady and a few other masked creeps begin to freak the hell out of the couple and (SPOILER ALERT) ultimately kill them in a “gut-wrenching” way.

That was a pun I just made.

Silent House (2011)

Elizabeth Olson is helping her father and uncle renovate a cabin to get ready for its sale and soon becomes isolated from them.  She gets trapped inside with intruders and has to try out a few hiding places in the house.  I don’t want to give anything else away, so just watch it.  This one is creepy and filled with some great twists and turns.

The Purge (2013)

The Purge movies have become pretty popular, and although I like Anarchy and Election Year better than the first, it’s still a pretty great example of home invasion horror.  Even a super-rich family with all sorts of security measures protecting their home isn’t safe from annual purgers after their son lets in a man trying to escape being murdered.

High Tension (2003)

This is one of my favorite French horror movies, and I love the craziness of it all.  A woman travels to her family’s country home to visit and brings along her friend.  They’re brutally attacked, and the thrill ride that follows is so stressful and insane.  I love it.

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That’s only a small portion of home invasion horror movies out there.  If you run through those, you can try The Last House on the Left, The People Under the Stairs, or the French movies Martyrs or Inside.  I haven’t seen Inside yet, but I plan on remedying that within the next week or so.

And I only recommend Martyrs if you’re ready to be messed up for a little while.  That movie, man.  It’s rough.

Independence Day Trilogy: A Patriotic Tribute to Horror

Happy 4th of July! We Americans are celebrating our independence hard today with hamburgers, ice cream, and fireworks, and if you’re like me, you’ll want to add a little fright to the mix.

Unfortunately, there aren’t too many Independence Day-themed horror movies out there, but there are at least enough to add a little horror to your holiday.  So if you were wondering what kinds of horror movies to watch on the 4th of July, wonder no more.

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I recommend starting with the horror-comedy Uncle Sam (1996), because I think it’s always best to start off light and end fierce with make-your-own trilogies.  There’s a science to it, people.

This movie is about a Desert Storm veteran who returns from the grave on Independence Day to punish the unpatriotic citizens of his hometown.  And he does it with a super-cool Uncle Sam mask.  Full of blood and gore and absurdity, this is a great flick to start off on.

Next up in the unofficial 4th of July Horror Movie Trilogy is I Know What You Did Last Summer (1998).  Jennifer Love Hewitt shows off her “talents” in this movie about a group of friends who runs over a stranger after an Independence Day celebration and covers it up by dumping the body. Of course, said stranger comes back to terrorize them resulting in madness and mayhem for them and fun for you.

Finally, let’s wrap this thing up with the always classic Jaws (1975).  You can’t very well have a 4th of July Horror Movie Trilogy without it.  I’m not even going to go into details with this one.  It’s Jaws, for god’s sake.

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Well, there you have it.  The Official Unofficial 4th of July Horror Movie Trilogy.  I’m feeling pretty good about this one.

And for a little extra credit: if you’re just way too pumped after your hella patriotic firework display, you can throw a little of The Purge (2013) or The Purge: Anarchy (2014) into the mix. Sure, they don’t have anything to do with the 4th, but you have to admit that the new founding fathers from these movies have created a super-patriotic holiday, sans fireworks.

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I hope everyone has a fun and safe holiday!  Let me know what you think of the trilogy in the comments.

Throwback: Late 90s Teen Horror

Ah, the 90s.  They were fun, right?  So many great things came from that decade – the fashion, grunge, Must-See TV, Beanie Babies, The Backstreet Boys.  And, hey, what about that Macarena?

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These guys get it.

Fortunately for us, the decade also spawned a ton of horror movies – some great, some not so much.  But for this post, I want to focus on the last half of the decade and the rash of teen slasher movies all started by one little movie you might have heard about: Scream.

Scream came out in 1996 and revitalized the slasher genre.  I love this movie.  It’s a funny, bloody, self-aware good time, and the sequels – although they’re not as great – keep the punchline going.  Neve Campbell established herself as a worthy addition to the scream queen hall of fame, and Ghostface has now become almost as iconic as Michael Myers, Freddy, and Jason.

Following Scream, we had:

  • I Know What You Did Last Summer (October 1997)
  • Scream 2 (December 1997)
  • Disturbing Behavior (July 1998)
  • Halloween H2O (August 1998)
  • Urban Legend (September 1998)
  • Bride of Chucky (October 1998)
  • The Faculty (November 1998)
  • I Still Know What You Did Last Summer (November 1998)

I mean just look at that list!  I’m feeling the nostalgia.  For real.  How about you?  What’s your favorite movie from the list?

 

TFO’s Top 5 Favorite Shark Movies (That Aren’t Jaws)

Who doesn’t love a good shark movie?  After Jaws made everyone scared to go into the water in 1975, movies featuring our fearsome finned friends popped up everywhere.  And after SyFy entered the picture with its seemingly endless supply of shark-themed craziness, we certainly have enough movies to satisfy our bloody cravings.

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To coincide with both Shark Week and the newly released “The Shallows” starring Blake Lively, I thought it would be quite appropriate to list my top 5 favorite shark movies that aren’t Jaws…because what shark movie list wouldn’t have the most famous shark at number 1?

And, for the record, I’m not saying these are good movies; I’m saying they’re my favorites.

Here it goes:

5. Mega Shark vs. Mecha Shark

Oh? Did you not expect me to have SyFy shark movies on this list?  Yes, they might be over-the-top, terribly-acted pieces of junk with horrible special effects, but damnit, they’re fun.

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Yeah. Pretty sure these effects beat good ol’ SyFy.

SyFy has crafted a very big guilty pleasure for a lot of people.  From giant crocodiles to weird mashups of creepy-crawlies, there’s no creature that’s safe.  And sharks are one of their favorite subjects.

Mega Shark vs. Mecha Shark is terrible – just terrible.  But in a good way.  There are some “unforeseen” complications when a shark-shaped submarine is sent to kill a huge shark that’s terrorizing people. Yep.  They fight. People die. It’s awesome.

4. Open Water

Two divers get left behind by their tour boat and have to fend for themselves against the terrors of the ocean…including some – you guessed it – hungry sharks.  This movie is intense.  It’s not one I can rewatch over and over, but it’s a good one.

3. Ghost Shark

Another SyFy masterpiece.  There’s a ghost shark haunting a small coastal town, and it’s just spectacular.  The deaths in this movie crack me up (don’t judge me).  A guy gets eaten on a slip-n-slide and one guy gets split completely in half after he drinks – yes, drinks – some ghost shark-infected water.

2. Deep Blue Sea

Oh, man, I loved this movie when it came out, and I still think it definitely has some rewatch value.  Thomas Jane, Saffron Burrows, Samuel L. Jackson, and LL Cool J feature in this movie about super sharks genetically engineered at a science station in the middle of the ocean.  The point is to find a cure for Alzheimer’s, but things don’t exactly work out as planned.  And (SPOILER ALERT) Samuel L. Jackson’s death scene is one of my favorite surprises of any horror movie.

1. The Sharknado Series

I. Freaking. Love. These. Movies.

They are so stupid.  They are so crazy.  They are so awesome.  If you like shark movies, how can you not watch the triple-threat that is the Sharknado series.  The last movie, Sharknado 3: Oh Hell No, was fantastically terrible.  They resorted to space travel to vanquish the Sharknado.  Space!  And the fourth movie in the series, Sharknado: The 4th Awakens (LOVE IT!) premiers on July 31!

So. Effing. Excited.

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Anyone disagree with this list?  Or maybe you agree and just want to add an observation?  Let me know in the comments.  I’d love to hear from you.

10 Horror Movies to Get You Ready for Summer

I don’t know about your neck of the woods, but it is hot as HELL outside.  The first day of summer is rapidly approaching, and if you want to know what horror movies to watch to get you in the mood, let’s count down the top 10 best horror movies to get you ready for summer.  Whether they take place at a summer camp, a beach, or just a dusty, hot locale, these movies will get you in the right mindset.

10. The Ruins (2008): A group of friends on a trek through Mexico happen upon some ruins that hold a terrifying secret.  You can practically feel the heat coming out of the television.

9. Sleepaway Camp (1983): This cult-favorite slasher takes place at a  summer camp.

8. I Know What You Did Last Summer (1997):  Recent graduates celebrating after the summer pageant victory of one of their own accidentally mow down an innocent pedestrian.

7. Piranha 3D (2010): Beachgoers are terrorized by bloodthirsty piranhas and try to survive.  Makes me want to go for a dip right now…

6. The Final Girls (2015): A girl and her friends are sucked into a crappy slasher movie and have to fight to survive.  This is another one that takes place (at least the movie within the movie) at a summer camp.  If you want to survive a horror movie, don’t go to a summer camp.

5. The Cabin in the Woods (2012): College friends on vacation are manipulated into playing out every horror movie ever made – ever.

4. The Hills Have Eyes (1977): A family gets stranded in the desert on summer vacation and get attacked by crazy, desert-dwelling mutants.  Summer fun?  Not so much.

3. Texas Chainsaw Massacre (1974): A group of friends go on a summer road trip and get stuck in a nasty, dusty, hot town in Texas.  This one makes me sweat just watching it, and I’m not about from fear.

1.  Jaws (1975) and Friday the 13th (1980): Well, I just couldn’t decide between the two of these for the top position, so I let them share the title.  Beach vs. summer camp.  It’s really hard to pick.  And both are classics, so…yeah.  I’m not up for that kind of decision-making at the moment.

So what movies get you in the mood for summer?

Upcoming Horror Movies

For this edition of Friday Night Frights and in honor of the release of The Conjuring 2, I thought I’d update the list of upcoming horror movies.  I initially made this list for my second blog post, but after going to see X-Men: Apocalypse last weekend and coming across a movie poster for Bye Bye Man, a movie I had not heard about until then, I thought it was time for an update.

So without further adieu, here it is:

MOVIE TITLERELEASE DATE
The Conjuring 2June 10
ClownJune 17
The ShallowsJune 24
The Neon DemonJune 24
The Purge: Election YearJuly 1
GhostbustersJuly 15
Lights OutJuly 22
Don't Breathe (AKA A Man in the Dark)August 26
Patient ZeroSeptember 2
Before I WakeSeptember 9
When the Bough BreaksSeptember 16
DeliriumSeptember 30
Underworld 5October 14
Ouija: Origin of EvilOctober 21
Boo! A Madea HalloweenOctober 21
RingsOctober 28
The Strangers 2December 2
Bye Bye ManDecember 9

It has grown considerably since I created it in April, and I bet I’ll have a few more to add or delete before the end of the year.  The movie I’m most ready for is Lights Out, and they’ve actually moved it up from its September release date.  *Happy dance, happy dance*

I’m thinking about expanding the list to go out a full year and adding it as a page at the top of the blog that I’ll update regularly.  I’ve been looking at the upcoming movies for 2017, and let’s just say that the words “remake” and “reboot” will be popping up aplenty.  Not that I’m complaining, but there have to be some original ideas left somewhere.  Right?

Well, now that the big part is finished, is anyone going to see The Conjuring 2 tonight?  I’m so excited.  I might have another happy dance left.  Let me check.

*Happy dance*

There it is.  Have a great weekend, everyone!

Top 20 Horror Movies to Make You Laugh

Not everyone loves horror movies.  Shocking. I know.  But there are people out there that just don’t like to be scared, at least not completely.  That’s why so many horror movies throw in comic relief from time to time.

So for those people who need a little more laughs than shivers, here’s the Fright Owl’s Top 20 Horror Movies to Make You Laugh.

Warning: Here be spoilers.

20) Texas Chainsaw Massacre: The Next Generation (1994): Matthew McConaughey and Renee Zelwegger both star in this TCM sequel.  It’s got a terrible rating on IMDB, but I recommend it just for the absurdity of it all.  Plus, Renee Zelwegger bellows a menacing “You sit the fuck down!” at a rising Leatherface.  Instant classic moment.

19) House (1986): The monsters in this remind me of a Looney Tunes episode.  Just a bunch of craziness and some classic 80s sweaters.

18) Lake Placid (1999): Betty White plays an old lady who has been feeding alligators along with her husband in her lake for years.  Who cares that one got so big it started eating people?  You leave her babies alone.

17) Gremlins 2 (1990): This was so entertaining to me when I was a kid, and it still has some good value today.  The gremlins dress up in all sorts of fun little costumes, and remember the theater scene?  Love it.

16) American Werewolf in London (1981):  This one’s a little scarier than some on the list, but it’s got some comedic value, mostly in the form of David’s deceased buddy, Jack.

15) Slither (2006): Gross and funny, this one stars fan-favorite Nathan Fillion and boasts some great laughs and many nasty moments to make you cringe.

14) The Lost Boys (1987): Corey Haim and Corey Feldman team up to take down the vampire menace plaguing their town, and while there are some serious moments, there are a ton of laughs.

13) Behind the Mask: The Rise of Leslie Vernon (2007):  This innovative horror film cracked me up when I first saw it.  It’s a very different take on the genre, taken from the point of view of a documentary film crew who interviews an up-and-coming slasher.

12) Jennifer’s Body (2009): This movie was dogged when it first came out, maybe because it starred Megan Fox.  But believe me when I say that this one is crazy entertaining.

11) Zombieland (2009):  Just give Woody Harrelson some twinkies!  I’m not a fan of Jesse Eisenberg, but this horror comedy had a lot of great moments and some great laughs.  And I, of course, have to mention THE cameo from Bill Murray.  I mean, how great was that?

10) Young Frankenstein (1974): Such a classic movie starring the late, great Gene Wilder.  The ‘Puttin’ on the Ritz’ dance is a classic movie moment, and although I’ve seen it over and over, I laugh every time.

9) The ‘Burbs (1989): Tom Hanks just wants to have a quiet vacation at his home, but his neighbor isn’t having it and wants him to help investigate the creepy newcomers who just moved next door.  So many shenanigans.  And another one with Corey Feldman.

8) Ghostbusters (1984):  I don’t think I need to go into any description of this one, a classic comedy with ghosts aplenty.

7) Seed of Chucky (2004): The Child’s Play movies started off scary, but Chucky went full funny in this one.

6) Tremors (1990): Kevin Bacon has to deal with crazy creatures under the dirt in his desert home, but no worries, Reba McEntire is there to help.

5) Cabin in the Woods (2012): Joss Whedon and Drew Goddard made a classic when they made this one.  It’s a different take on the origin of scary movies, and it delivers laugh after laugh along with the scary moments.

4) Tucker & Dale Vs. Evil (2010):  Just a big misunderstanding leads to some hilarious situations in this movie starring Alan Tudyk and Tyler Labine.

3) Evil Dead II (1987) & Army of Darkness (1992): I let these two share a number because I just couldn’t decide which one to put on top.  Bruce Campbell is amazing in both.

2) Beetlejuice (1988): This movie delivers a ghost story with some hilarity and a fantastic I performance from Michael Keaton.

1) Shaun of the Dead (2004): I LOVE THIS MOVIE.  This is the first of the Cornetto Trilogy from Edgar Wright and Simon Pegg, and it’s a crazy-fun ride through the zombie apocalypse.

So are there any that should have been on this list that I missed?