Jaws | The Fright Owl

Happy 4th of July! We Americans are celebrating our independence hard today with hamburgers, ice cream, and fireworks, and if you’re like me, you’ll want to add a little fright to the mix.

Unfortunately, there aren’t too many Independence Day-themed horror movies out there, but there are at least enough to add a little horror to your holiday. So if you were wondering what kinds of horror movies to watch on the 4th of July, wonder no more.

I recommend starting with the horror-comedy Uncle Sam (1996), because I think it’s always best to start off light and end fierce with make-your-own trilogies. There’s a science to it, people.

This movie is about a Desert Storm veteran who returns from the grave on Independence Day to punish the unpatriotic citizens of his hometown. And he does it with a super-cool Uncle Sam mask. Full of blood and gore and absurdity, this is a great flick to start off on.

Next up in the unofficial 4th of July Horror Movie Trilogy is I Know What You Did Last Summer (1998). Jennifer Love Hewitt shows off her “talents” in this movie about a group of friends who runs over a stranger after an Independence Day celebration and covers it up by dumping the body. Of course, said stranger comes back to terrorize them resulting in madness and mayhem for them and fun for you.

Finally, let’s wrap this thing up with the always classic Jaws (1975). You can’t very well have a 4th of July Horror Movie Trilogy without it. I’m not even going to go into details with this one. It’s Jaws, for god’s sake.

Well, there you have it. The Official Unofficial 4th of July Horror Movie Trilogy. I’m feeling pretty good about this one.

And for a little extra credit: if you’re just way too pumped after your hella patriotic firework display, you can throw a little of The Purge (2013) or The Purge: Anarchy (2014) into the mix. Sure, they don’t have anything to do with the 4th, but you have to admit that the new founding fathers from these movies have created a super-patriotic holiday, sans fireworks.

I hope everyone has a fun and safe holiday! Let me know what you think of the trilogy in the comments.

Who doesn’t love a good shark movie? After Jaws made everyone scared to go into the water in 1975, movies featuring our fearsome finned friends popped up everywhere. And after SyFy entered the picture with its seemingly endless supply of shark-themed craziness, we certainly have enough movies to satisfy our bloody cravings.

To coincide with both Shark Week and the newly released “The Shallows” starring Blake Lively, I thought it would be quite appropriate to list my top 5 favorite shark movies that aren’t Jaws…because what shark movie list wouldn’t have the most famous shark at number 1?

And, for the record, I’m not saying these are good movies; I’m saying they’re my favorites.

Here it goes:

5. Mega Shark vs. Mecha Shark

Oh? Did you not expect me to have SyFy shark movies on this list? Yes, they might be over-the-top, terribly-acted pieces of junk with horrible special effects, but damnit, they’re fun.

Yeah. Pretty sure these effects beat good ol’ SyFy.

SyFy has crafted a very big guilty pleasure for a lot of people. From giant crocodiles to weird mashups of creepy-crawlies, there’s no creature that’s safe. And sharks are one of their favorite subjects.

Mega Shark vs. Mecha Shark is terrible – just terrible. But in a good way. There are some “unforeseen” complications when a shark-shaped submarine is sent to kill a huge shark that’s terrorizing people. Yep. They fight. People die. It’s awesome.

4. Open Water

Two divers get left behind by their tour boat and have to fend for themselves against the terrors of the ocean…including some – you guessed it – hungry sharks. This movie is intense. It’s not one I can rewatch over and over, but it’s a good one.

3. Ghost Shark

Another SyFy masterpiece. There’s a ghost shark haunting a small coastal town, and it’s just spectacular. The deaths in this movie crack me up (don’t judge me). A guy gets eaten on a slip-n-slide and one guy gets split completely in half after he drinks – yes, drinks – some ghost shark-infected water.

2. Deep Blue Sea

Oh, man, I loved this movie when it came out, and I still think it definitely has some rewatch value. Thomas Jane, Saffron Burrows, Samuel L. Jackson, and LL Cool J feature in this movie about super sharks genetically engineered at a science station in the middle of the ocean. The point is to find a cure for Alzheimer’s, but things don’t exactly work out as planned. And (SPOILER ALERT) Samuel L. Jackson’s death scene is one of my favorite surprises of any horror movie.

1. The Sharknado Series

I. Freaking. Love. These. Movies.

They are so stupid. They are so crazy. They are so awesome. If you like shark movies, how can you not watch the triple-threat that is the Sharknado series. The last movie, Sharknado 3: Oh Hell No, was fantastically terrible. They resorted to space travel to vanquish the Sharknado. Space! And the fourth movie in the series, Sharknado: The 4th Awakens (LOVE IT!) premiers on July 31!

So. Effing. Excited.

Anyone disagree with this list? Or maybe you agree and just want to add an observation? Let me know in the comments. I’d love to hear from you.

The Fright Owl

Tag Archives: Jaws

Independence Day Trilogy: A Patriotic Tribute to Horror

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